Introduction by Global Domination
17/05/11 || Global Domination
What the fuck is this then? Well… Since labels and bands think we are Teh Shit (and rightfully so) they send us fucken piles and piles of albums to review. Most of them suck the cocks of goats, hence why we won’t spend our valuable time giving them a 16-paragraph review since they don’t deserve it. That’s why the STUBS section was created. Here you will get short reviews for a lot of crap, with the, perhaps, occasional decent offering included. Just look at the score and you’ll figure it all out.
In February 2014 we improved this section, meaning at times a few of us will deal with a bunch of albums in one larger review bundle. Yeah, it kinda looks like Audio Autopsy, only it is not. It’s called S(crap)s when we deal with it like that. Magic, huh? If your album ended up in here in any way, shape or form – you most likely suck it. Live with it. You should be happy we have decided to cover your shit band at all.
30/06/14 || Ironpants
Satariel: White Ink Chapter One
Lord K: And suddenly they pop up again! Completely unexpected and fucken great as usual. 8
Ironpants: Pretty decent shit, but it’s a bit supressed and lacks a little “spunk”. 6
Habakuk: Why is this in scraps? Well okay, it ain’t legendary. 6
sly: Too much melodic not enough death. They’re afraid that if they’re too brutal they’ll only attract girls like this so they throw in some pretty, clear vocals for good measure in hopes of getting girls like this . 3.5
Lord K: Blasting death metal, double kicks all over the place and some technical shit in all other areas. More American than Swedish sounding. Works in small doses. 7
Ironpants: I like Sectu, I think they are a underrated band. I also like the drummer, interesting stuff. If GD wasn’t going to the grave I would’ve given these fuckers a full-on review. 8
Habakuk: Bla bla bla, but I’ve sure heard worse! 6
sly: It’s a good mesh of Scandinavian and American death metal. The riffs are twisted and slightly proggy and the guitars really compliment instead of copy each other. Add to that a foreboding atmosphere and you’ve got an 8
Serpent Venom: Of things seen & unseen
Lord K: Some semi-doomy rock shit that always never peaked my love-o-meter in the past and will not do so now. 3
Ironpants: Another one of “those” bands. I can’t really get into these super-slow acts, get the party started once in a while will ‘ya? 5
Habakuk: Last time I heard Venom, they sounded a lot less like The Sword. 6
sincan: This is some pretty decent doom, in the forever über producing genre of fattened marijuana injecters. 6
sly: It’s not bad for what it is, but it’s got absolutely zero originality. If I want to listen to something that sounds like Saint Vitus or Electric Wizard, I’ll listen to Saint Vitus or Electric Wizard. Or one of the other 8 million bands who play this stuff. 5.5
Temtris: Shallow grave
Lord K: I played Tetris a few times in the past. I fucken hate that game, but I take it over this confused shit every day of the week. One second it’s black metalish, the other it’s whatthefuckever metal. Focus. I dig those clean vocals though. 3
Ironpants: Fuck! Lord K had the first joke there. I’ll second him on everything he said, even about the clean vox… You know by now that I resent metal with lady singers, but this nightingale actually delivers. If only the band could tag along and play some good music with that, they would be in the clear. 4
Habakuk: Is this asking for a video game joke or what? Am I scoring everything a 6 or what? 6
sly: Blend Evanescence with that hilarious dump you took this morning and you’ve got Temtris. 2
The Hidden: Fearful symmetry
Lord K: I can never bash anything that people from F.K.Ü. are involved in. Old-school thrash as played in the 80’s and for some reason I believe this is the very Agent Steel tribute thing they’ve been talking about. I never dug that band, but I understand where The Hidden are coming from. 7
Ironpants: Well fuck me sideways. I did not know about this band until now, and they have motherfucken Matte Modin on drums. Pretty cool shit going on here, even if the vocals is taking it down a bit. Agent Steel sucked balls though. 7
Habakuk: If only the shit vocals were a bit more … hidden. Zing! 6
sly: These guys love Agent Steel and they’re not afraid to show it. I felt like I was sitting in America listening to the ’80s. 8
Unearthly: Flagellum Dei
Lord K: And here we go! The cover and logo screams “BEHEMOTH!” and the music does the same. Great shit. 8
Ironpants: Indeed, this Brazilian outfit knows what they are doing – and how Behemoth did it. Never the less, quality stuff. But is the album from 2011? How come they send it to us now? Or did they send it by boat? 7
Habakuk: Well, somebody likes Behemoth! 7
sincan: Well, blackened death extreme metal medley. 6
sly: Total Behemoth worship with a healthy dose of South American savagery. 7.5
Lord K: Not on my watch. Ever. 2
Ironpants: Oh man, what am I going to do now when I can listen to music I like? 3
Habakuk: If I had more TIME I might get into ZAUM more. 6
sly: I don’t know if there’s a market for a Canadian band that sounds like a psychedelic OM with lousy vocals. 4.5
29/06/14 || The Duff
Lvcifyre come from London, England, are on Dark Descent Records and appear to revel in an ideology of Deicide mixed with Nightbringer; they play Incantation, sickly, claustrophobic, twisted, and while the musicianship is noteworthy, especially drummer Menthor, the music is inhospitable, difficult to interpret; I don’t understand the underground’s deeply rooted idolatry of them, with a first track that nearly has me walking away from the rest in frustration of its absurdly sparse duration. It is supposed to set the mood to an otherwise competent album with two or three absolutely exemplary riffs that sadly do not make up for an album that sludges past; any memorability of the Dead Congregation/Borgia-ilk is lost, but even the hypnotic nature of Portal seems lost on “Svn eater”.
6 by default to give them the benefit of the doubt out of 10.
29/06/14 || The Duff
Decaying Purity are a technical brutal death metal band, probably the catchiest death metal band next to Insision or Cannibal Corpse circa “The Bleeding”, sounding most like the former but with some hints of black metal. Whereas on the past record we had five new tracks and four re-recorded, here we have ten brand new tracks the writing for which started soon after the release of “The Existence of Infinite Agony” and there is a sense of the band overstretching, repeating itself but then I am not one to turn away from the chug-riffs they churn out with absolute head-banging precision. Any difference in the production from one album to the next is indistinguishable, this is crunchy stuff and despite in need of some trimming down it is unbridled, catchy and plain good fun – two thumbs up for 02:25 of “Everlasting Hell in Sanctity” and once more the glorious artwork.
7 out of 10, a worthy follow-up to one of the greatest albums of 2011.
29/06/14 || The Duff
Another gem in the brutal death metal world comes with Unique Leader’s Condemned, a Californian band that plays Disgorge-lite and plays it well – they became more of a lethargic, perhaps original beast with their second full-length “Realms of the Ungodly”, but one thing I can say about that record is a lot of the faster riffs suffered at the expense of monolithic sludge as if they had taken on a secondary importance; this is more a no-frills brutal death metal record with quite repetitive slams (I am repeatedly playing 2:05-2:07 of “Impulsive Dismemberment”, some funny stuff and made to settle arguments), a good contrast between speed and sledgehammer plus everything awarded due place in the mix with an air-light, tinny snare sound that will have fans of BDM-elite dribbling all over their clothes.
7,5 great blasts from the past out of 10
29/06/14 || The Duff
Around this time in Brutal Death Metal 101 we had “Consume the Forsaken” and “Parallels of Infinite Torture” by Disgorge, “Prelude to the Tragedy” by Defeated Sanity and Guttural Secrete’s “Reek of Putrefaction”, and in comparison, given the production and even then the quality of the riffing, this album is dated, it is late, it is not much on what Cerebral Effusion became with “Impulsive Pyschopathic Acts”, but goddamn is it catchy, and there are honestly some quality death metal moments that rival the aforementioned legendary records. If anything this band started a bulk of its career listening to a lot of Cannibal Corpse and Dying Fetus before finally morphing into something more unique – at a bargain of eighteen euros for all the band’s full-lengths, it does no harm to be rewarded with this band’s modest initial sound.
6,5 young and hungry starting out bands out of 10
29/06/14 || Lord K Philipson
Here it is, the last thing I’ll ever fucken stub/review for Global Domination. So appropriate they are called Soundchaser since that’s what we have been chasing for fucken years and years – some sounds that don’t SUCK IT. Well, of course Soundchaser isn’t a blessing in disguise, they pretty much stink just like everything else you never heard of that we have been reviewing here since day one. I just wish I could get to review something killer such as the new Septicflesh or any of the old classics from Forbidden as my last thing here, but I guess I’ll have to leave that to someone more fortunate (hint hint).
This then? Well, take the thinnest fucken production you can imagine. Put some idiot on vocals whose pipes fit the half-progressive Megadeth-ish (and whatnot) music like cock in cunt on top of it all and consider today’s stub completed.
3/10: Thank you for keeping the tradition of SUCK intact here at GD.
29/06/14 || sincan
Mord’A‘Stigmata is a Polish black metal band with post metal influences. Their music offers great guitar lines of tremolo win and some jazziness in a manner not too unlike to that of Deathspell omega, not just in the same caliber though.
Take the opening track Inkaust and let it be your guide towards liking this album, because if you think it sucks, you are most likely into Death by Anal. And that my “friend” is not something to seek for, unless u suck.
Speaking of sucking, doesn’t it suck to be stubbed when the album is good? I think so, but then I’m also perfect and do what I want.
7/10: Serpent strings of jazz.
28/06/14 || The Duff
Disentomb are a brutal death metal band hailing from Queensland, Australia, and that about says it – this is a short fucken stub to say the least, but if you were to take Guttural Secrete’s “Reek of Prepubescent Despoilment”, make it less consistent, a little less memorable and give it an identical production of bass-heavy and gristle in your crispy lettuce, you would get a solid slab of brutal death metal mixing Disgorge and Cannibal Corpse, an album that slightly overstays its welcome but is otherwise an impressive debut, quite a gnarly and fresh-sounding record considering Guttural Secrete abandoned this style of crunch and catchy bytheir second masterful full-length. Recommended.
7 reworks of classic albums out of 10.
28/06/14 || The Duff
Deafheaven are a two-piece Californian post-rock/black metal band that has regrettably been likened to Liturgy but instead take Wolves in the Throne Room to interesting new heights, blending euphoria, melancholy, intensity and introspection to meaningful results. Labeled pretentious, I think the interludes add greatly to the weight of “Sunbather”, an album that has garnered praise throughout the popular musical press and consequently been unfairly snubbed by the underground; I find this album glorious, perfect, heartfelt and boasting a phenomenal drum performance by session drummer Daniel Tracy.
9 modern black metal masterpieces out of 10.
28/06/14 || The Duff
Artificial Brain are a five-piece hailing from New York. What I’ve noticed with this band and say Archspire (a tech-death band following in the footsteps of Spawn of Possession) is that they are taking pioneering sounds and presenting them in a friendly, abbreviated format, with structure and hooks, which is all fine, the musicianship excels as ever, but with Gorguts, Artificial Brain’s chief inspiration ranking them alongside Baring Teeth and Pyrrhon, is it not meant to be grandiose to the point of taking your head off? Still, this is a focused band with some great, dark atmosphere, memorable riffs and a steamrolling vocalist called Will Smith no less, ten tracks mixing energy, creep and intergalactic poise.
7,5 stripped down Gorguts clones out of 10