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Devour the Domination

Not yet familiar with the bands hosted at Global Domination? Now's definitely the time to check 'em out. And what could be a better place for it than their Myspace-pages? Links below...

Stubs

Introduction by Global Domination

17/05/11  ||  Global Domination

What the fuck is this then? Well… Since labels and bands think we are Teh Shit (and rightfully so) they send us fucken piles and piles of albums to review. Most of them suck the cocks of goats, hence why we won’t spend our valuable time giving them a 16-paragraph review since they don’t deserve it. That’s why the STUBS section has been created. Here you will get short reviews for alot of crap, with the, perhaps, occasional decent offering included. Just look at the score and you’ll figure it all out.

Yeah, the formatting is reminiscent of that of Audio Autopsy, only this is not… tada!… Audio Autopsy. Magic, huh? If your album ended up in here – you most likely suck it. Live with it. You should be happy we have decided to cover your shit band at all.

  • Memoria: Death calls the islands

    23/02/12  ||  Smalley

    Memoria better hope that death doesn’t call the islands, seeing as how they’re from the same neck of the woods as Double D is (Australia). Though, there isn’t really any indication of that in their music anywhere; that’s what I like about metal, how it seems a band from any country ever can just “plug into” overall trends, and sound as legit at it as any band from Norway or Sweden or the other big metal countries. Anyway, “calls” is a pretty decent debut, with some good aggression and harsh atmosphere/production in their particular brand of black metal, and some interesting avant garde touches, but still lacks a bit when it comes to hookiness; the songs are engaging enough while they’re still playing, but once they’re over, they don’t have that infectious sort of songwriting to them to keep you playing them over and over just in your head. Now THAT’S when you know you’ve got some good songwriting.

    Also, the vocalwork is a bit muddled, whether it be the harsher stuff or cleaner; they both kind of just get lost in the mix, obscured by the buzz of the rhythm guitar. Still, it isn’t a deal-breaker, and their songwriting does possess enough variation to keep me interested, if not quite enamored.

    7/10: Keep at it, ya Blackmetaldile Dundees.

  • Gadget: The funeral march

    22/02/12  ||  Lord K Philipson

    It’s impossible to talk about Swedish grind and not mention Nasum, so here you go: Nasum. There. Happy now? Let’s move on… Gadget’s another grind outfit and this album, “The funeral march”, was released in 2006. Why we’re getting it now (on LP nonetheless) is beyond me though. Whatever. Gadget’s doing there thing all fine and their eventual half-melodic stuff really works within the frame of this style. While a band like Nasum (fuck, we went there again…) comes across as full-on relentless, Gadget’s a little more controlled and death metal oriented. I was never a huge fan of grindcore (except for the amazing “World downfall” album by Terrorizer, if that counts), but Gadget’s version of it sure holds up and I might need to check these guys out more closely. Also, a playing time of 30 minutes is perfect for this kind of music.

    7/10: Inspector Gadget would be proud. I don’t even know what that means.

  • Primal: Deathzone

    21/02/12  ||  Habakuk

    I’ve been conditioned well enough by now that when I read “Polish black/death”, I compulsively start salivating – until I read “one man project”, which reeks of not much death but a lot of black metal. We need it the other way round, foo! Leave the basement and get some friends! No no, don’t worry folks, it doesn’t sound like one of those obscure “projects” whose biggest problem about being a one man show is that there’s no-one around to say “fuck that part, it sucks. And by the way, can’t we just fucken break up? I don’t want to be associated with this crap anymore.” No, it’s quite okay stuff. Nothing more, nothing less. If you’re dying to hear a dude black metal croak his way through some decently produced 8 tracks with slight death metal leanings, this is a chance as good as any. There is an alright dark vibe, a few engaging parts where the drums break into a simple Celtic Frost-like rhythm (but they should be integrated better), a few stupid parts that should leave, and as a whole this is a decent attempt that lacks big-time in terms of memorability. Getting rid of the massive vocal echo and a lot of weeding out in songstructure might help in the future.

    5.5/10: Whatever, really. Not bad by all means, but why listen to this and not something else? I don’t know.

  • Dead Label: Sense of slaughter

    20/02/12  ||  Detox

    First of all, fuck you for making this album. I’m not normally that aggressive about reviewing an album, but come on! Want to know what’s in store on this recording? Average, monotonous high ranged typical metalcore shouts mixed with occasional really weak grunts. What else, you ask? Breakdowns… lots of breakdowns. Add in some mid tempo double bass, repetitious leads that go nowhere laced with irritable chugs and odd harmonics and you get a band that makes Hatebreed enjoyable by comparison. Take all that and add in the fact that every song sounds almost exactly like the one before it. To make matters worse the album even starts off with the overdone and unnecessary idea of having a set of very average melo-death riffs that GO NOWHERE and DON’T EVEN LEAD INTO THE FIRST ACTUAL TRACK. This is one of those bands that make the hybridization of hardcore and heavy metal look really bad and makes it increasingly hard for the small circle of bands lumped into the genre who are actually good at it get any sort of worthwhile recognition. Even in 2002/2003 when this sort of style was starting to blossom in the more mainstream metal scenes this would’ve been an uninteresting piece of music to come across. For the love of anything sacred, go listen to Ekotren, Earth Crisis, Walls Of Jericho or even Chimaira and let this disappear into the arms of the abyss like it deserves to. Can I have nu metal back now, please?

    1.5/10: Is it sad that I’ve actually heard worse than this?

  • Bereft: Bereft

    17/02/12  ||  BamaHammer

    I don’t know at what point black metal becomes pagan or folk metal. It’s probably right about the time you think about putting a Tubescreamer in front of an accordion. This is some type of that repetitious folk-ish black metal that has somehow become popular these days and ultimately falls flat because it’s just so boring. It’s also an extremely long and tedious listen, clocking in at over an hour and featuring generally the same plodding, mid-paced tempo and thick, distorted guitar chording throughout. You know things are going to be bad when the intro track is over well over three minutes of ambient, atmospheric noise. The atmosphere Bereft develops is actually decent, but in the end, this is the same general form of black metal with folk influences that Summoning once did so well long ago. Bereft uses those vast, open soundscapes with the croaky vocals and takes song idea after song idea and bludgeons it mercilessly into the ground by repeating everything entirely too many times. I really can’t recommend this, but I can recommend Summoning. They’re way better at this type of stuff.

    4/10: Too many riffs come from the department of redundancy department.

  • Serpentia: The day in the year of candles

    16/02/12  ||  gk

    Serpentia’s 3rd album and they’ve been around since 1996. Metal Archives calls this melodic death metal and I can hear some In Flames here but there’s also some modern groove and when vocalist Ivy tries his hand at clean singing he sounds like a lighter version of Peter Steele and gives the songs a slight gothic touch. The songs are a bit all over the place with riffs that could at one time sound like they came from the Swedish school of melodeath and immediately switch to a mid paced chug that sounds like Pantera and often has a quite melodic section sitting in the song somewhere. It’s not quite metalcore but it’s bit like the band decided to write riffs that sound like whatever is popular at the moment in metal and then stitch them together in a sort of patchwork quilt. There’s no thought given to smooth transitions or trying to combine their influences into a cohesive whole. Overall, “The Day In The Year Of Candles” sounds like a confused mess.

    3/10: And replete with confusion.

  • Fetal Zombie: Fetal zombie

    15/02/12  ||  gk

    Listening to Fetal Zombie’s debut album was exactly the same as slowing down at a car crash site and being unable to look away. I realized 3 songs in that this was one ungodly mess but I couldn’t stop. I was also equal parts fascinated and curious to see where this album would go and how bad it would get. It starts with a catchy pop song with a pleasant female vocalist and then the second song is some sort of space rock meets doom with the same woman now sounding quite uncomfortable. After that, the music goes into a sort of Dog Fashion Disco wannabe sound with a really weak guitar tone and a pathetic drum machine. If that wasn’t bad enough, the woman with the decent voice is replaced by a whiny weak voiced man who seems to think he’s in a power metal band. The songs go through alt rock ballads, rock n roll, some death metal and even a Richard Clayderman like piano driven song. This is some awful stuff but its entertaining in its own strange and horrible way. Like the aural equivalent of Howling III.

    2/10: For the pop song at the start.

  • Uluun: The eternal winter

    14/02/12  ||  BamaHammer

    Apparently, Uuuluuuuun set out to create the shittiest black metal they could possibly produce and succeeded by all accounts. This is some shitty Parisian black metal from these fuckers, and let me be honest. I’d be hard-pressed to find worse black metal than this. I’d rather listen to Spartacus take a tough shit. It’s not that Uluun aren’t trying. I mean, their hearts are in the right place, but they’re just not very good at what they’re trying to do. This demo is five tracks that clock in at nearly 35 minutes, so hanging in there just to make it through a single song feels like torture. The guitars are out of tune just enough to be annoying most of the time. On the first track, the ride cymbal is 130 feet wide and 3 feet thick. The vocals are irritating as fvck, clean or otherwise. The bass player has the potential to be quasi-unshitty one day. Maybe, anyway. Some songs also just sound completely fucken different from others. On the first three, you can tell these fuckos half-assedly tried to put together some type of production. On the last two tracks, they threw a microphone on the floor outside the door of their parents’ basement where they were rehearsing/wanking, pressed record, and then said, “Fuck it. Put it on tape.”

    Well, fuuck yuu, Uluun.

    1/10: This fuucken suucks.

  • Zebarges: Stay barges or die!

    13/02/12  ||  gk

    In my short time here at GD I’ve come to view the stubs section with a certain amount of apprehension. I never really know what I’m going to get. The majority of releases range from bad to just bland. A few will be good and every now and then something utterly ridiculous will turn up. Zebarges is a French crossover band. “Stay Barges or Die!” is the bands third album and it’s completely ridiculous. It feels like the vocalist held the band at gun point, forced them to play their songs and then shouted the lyrics over the music. There’s a competent guitarist buried here somewhere. You have to pay attention. A song like “Testament” has some decent riffs but is utterly ruined by the vocalist who shouts out the lyrics with utter disregard for the music. Throw in an out of control drum machine, occasional swerves into acoustic tomfoolery and you’re left with an album that’s hilarious for the first few songs but is a big load of crap when the novelty wears off. Maybe this is a comedy band? For the first time in my life I’m wishing I knew French so I could figure out what this dude was shouting about. I suppose that’s a good thing.

    2/10 with comedic value limited to a couple of songs.

  • Aegeon: Forbidden entrance to the gardens of death

    10/02/12  ||  Smalley

    Because Metallum is currently blacked-out in protest of SOPA, I wasn’t able to ascertain whether “Forbidden entrance” was a full-length, EP, demo, whatevers, and I’m not going to bother with MySpace ‘cuz MySpace sucks. But anyway, even if this isn’t really a demo, it would still seem more “fair” to treat it as such, because the production here is just absolute shit; imagine the weakest, most ball-less, Darkthrone-inspired dentist drill-buzz guitar ever (with nigh-inaudible solos and quiet fart-strength bass), and you’re kinda there.

    The songwriting doesn’t make up for that either, as it’s just droning, generic, mostly hook-less black metal that feels like it goes on for way too long; srsly, this only lasts about 22+ minutes, and it still felt like I’d been listening a half hour after just the first track. I guess the vocals are fine, but that isn’t close to being enough. I imagine some BM fans would enjoy this simply for how tr00 and kvlt and non-conformist it is, but not me, so…

    4/10: Kill it with fire.

Complete Stubs-listing